Poem: My Biggest Fear

My body is filled with the regret
Of the things my mind longs to forget
I don't want to be this person anymore
I wish I could close this one open door
My mind constantly thinks it over
If only I could find a four leaf clover
Then I could wish for all this to disappear
So that I wouldn't have to live in this constant fear
Of the times your near
Or of the nights I'm on my own
I might now be full grown
But some days I wake with the fear that I did when I was eight years old
So many times I'm overcome by the thoughts of the story I've rarely told
I try to bury it deep inside of me
So that I can become the person I've always longed to be


- Esjae xo

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Poem: The Step I Have To Take

How many chances before you call it a day?
How many lies have I got to hear before I get my say?
I’m hearing so much nonsense
Boy don’t you have a conscience
Can’t you see what you’re doing to me?
A romantic gesture, on bended knee
That isn’t going to help you now
I can’t even scream about that other cow
You’ve reduced me to petty name calling
I wish I’d known when you had me falling
That I wouldn’t be your only
The last to call when you got lonely
I won’t be running back
I refuse to let the tears leave tracks
I’m turning my back on you
And everything you say you will do
Your words mean nothing
I’m just going to concentrate on living
This is the step I have to take
Even if it means my heart will break

 

 

What do you think?

-Esjae x

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Poem: Setting The Scene

Laying on the round
Looking so peaceful
The scene around you devastating
Flashing lights, sirens, blood
Everything is done for a reason
What reason is good enough for this?

Would you want to live again?
If there was an end like this
Would you be the victim?
Living in a new space
I’d be happy to take your place
Will you be happy now you lay so still?

 

What do you think?

-Esjae

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Poem: Precious

You body so precious
Your mind so priceless
Your soul floating lifeless
The result of so many harmful words
Making your soul float away like a flock of flying birds
I wish you could see
That what is happening to you just isn’t the way it should be
Each time you forgive and forget
They’ll never live with regret
You are worth so much more
The pain worse than before
One day you’ll open your eyes
And the haze will rise
Let the truth be told
About the life that used to be controlled
Your feelings no longer need to be hidden
The pain you once felt will never be forgiven
 

What do you think?

-Esjae x

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