Sunday, 31 July 2011

Quitters don’t win…

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I thought I’d post a little update for all of you on what I’m up to and what I’m planning to do. But firstly I’d like to say thank you for all of your advice and comments I appreciate all of them!

Right now I’m working on my rapping and beginning to take it more seriously – I’m hoping over the summer to record some tracks. I have some beats to use now and I’ve been writing some lyrics, so we’ll see where that goes.

I’ve posted the beginning of my novel for you, obviously there is a lot of editing to do on it. But it is heading in the right direction.

I have a dream to be a published writer and a recognised rapper, but to get there I can’t quit hence the title of this post.

- Esjae x

Friday, 29 July 2011

Poem: Always Yours

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I’m stuck on you
I’m falling in love
With everything you do
I want it to be you and me
Forever and always
It’s the way it should be
We’re together forever
I never want to let you go
This I want you to know
Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow
Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead
Just walk beside me, and be all that I need
Without you my heart was left without a beat
With you in my arms my life is complete
I want to be the smile you but on you face
The girl you hold in your embrace
Just don’t ever leave or walk away
This may sound cliché
But I love you forever and always

Thursday, 28 July 2011

Novel: The Beginning

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The sun was just setting, casting its bright orange glow across the buildings of the once busy town. As 6 o’clock was approaching, many figures could be seen filling the streets to celebrate the end of the week, varying in ages, and all scattering like ants down various alleyways heading towards their individual destinations. As the darkness of the night loomed, a figure could be seen making his way down a narrow cul-de-sac: his face was obscured by a hooded jacket pulled tightly over his head; a distinctive white wire was hanging from the pocket of his tight black skinny jeans; his slow walk was made even more obvious by the crystal white trainers gripping to his feet. This solitary figure was oblivious to everything around him, including the black cat crossing his path just several paces ahead, continuing in his journey like many other young people.

As the darkly dressed figure crossed the deserted road from between two blood red parked cars he noticed a looming shadow over his shoulder. Without trying to draw attention to himself he quickened his pace and hunched his shoulder slightly more. He tried to gain on the group of school friends just a couple of paces ahead just as he went to step into sink with them they disappeared into the local recreation ground. The unknown figure seemed to decide that he would carry on his journey following his original path quicken his pace even more to try and outrun the shadow closing in on him. As the darkly dressed figure rounded the corner of the road, a shiny object flashed across in his view held by a gloved hand that had appeared from the body that owned the shadow.

The dark, deserted cul-de-sac was flooded with flashing lights, screaming sirens mixed with the cries and screams of the young people crowded alongside the wailing ambulance. More people were being attracted to the c

ommotion of the brightly lit scene trying to get a better view to find out what was going on, many where whispering trying to piece together a story to find out what was happening in the centre of the crowd of darkly dressed people. The same questions could be heard echoing through the crowd, ‘who was it?’, ‘what was happening?’, and ‘why had the ambulance been called?’

With what seemed like hours later the crowd started to part slowly, emerging through the crowd was a surgical trolley with a body covered by a crystal white sheet, a deep red patch was seeping through it and slowly it became apparent to the crowd present what had happened that night. The whole crowd that had gathered, turned and watched in silence as the trolley passed through the crowd and entered the screaming ambulance. For several minutes after the ambulance had disappeared into the night the crowd remained silent, the shock had taken all of them, one of them had gone and would never come back, and this thought was being played over and over by everyone it could almost be read through their eyes fixed to the place where they were standing. Slowly people started to walk away from the scene in groups of two or three all still remaining silent trying to digest what they had just witnessed, trying to unwind that nights events.

***

The next morning as the sun was rising the new day hadn’t wiped the night’s events from the town; a glowing sun wasn’t able to erase the previous night’s events from the grieving community. Where the silent crowd had stood only a few hours ago: a solitary uniformed police officer stood guard of the scene; flowers now lined the road and the pavement blocking any way through; a few people all standing reading the messages people had written, tears running down the tracks on the cheeks of the strangers united in grieving for the loss of a member of their community.

 

Tell me what you think of this. Trying my hand at writing a book, this is what I’ve come up with so far, some editing needs to be done but tell me what you think so far.

-Esjae x

Poem: Already Broken Promise

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I was supposed to be your girl
The one you grace with diamonds and pearls
I swore to never hurt you
But look at what you can do
Is this you at your best?
With each lie that comes I’m waiting for the rest
If this is what love is supposed to be
Then this isn’t what I want, not you and me
Lets go back to the days when we first met
The days I really want to forget
People say things they don’t mean
But I know what I’ve seen
We can make up after a fight
But not this time, we’re not going to be alright
Let’s be honest
Oh wait, let’s go back a minute you’ve already broken that promise
I’m fed up of trying to put my life back together
Especially when you said we’d last forever

 

Tell me what you think

-Esjae

Tuesday, 26 July 2011

Poem: All You’re Worth

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I’ll give you all you’re worth
From the moon and the stars right down to the earth
Let’s stay together for the rest of time
Just promise that you’ll be mine
And that you’ll never let me go
Say that our love will grow, is that even possible
This love is already magical
Never thought I would have something so special
Never thought that one person could take over my mind
I think that this could be a sign
That you are meant to be mine
And that we’re meant to be together
For now and forever
Together we can take on the world
I want to be your only girl
The one to know your deepest secrets
And to never become one of your greatest regrets

 

Thanks for reading, let me know what you think of it in the comments.

- Esjae

Sunday, 24 July 2011

Poem: All The Good Things...

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Good things start small
Good people walk tall
Good things come to those who wait
Good people don’t take the bait

What goes around comes around
Don’t let it knock you to the ground
Words sting
Just remember your dreaming
Got your future planned
Not making decisions off hand

Remember
Start small
Walk tall
Sit tight and wait
And good things will come to you

 

This is a really old one, but I still look back on it because of the message in it. What do you think?

- Esjae x

Poem: All I Want

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All I want to do is see you smile
For you to see that I’m different
Not one of the crowd
All I want you to do is for you to let me be
The person I know I am
Not who you think I should be

All I want you to do
Say that you understand
Because you’ll always be proud
Of who ever I am
Of whatever I want to be
I need to know that you’ll always love me

 

What do you think of this one? Do you like the message?

-Esjae x

Poem: Ain’t No Other Way

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Let’s sit down
Talk it out
Work it out
There’s a future in me and you
Can you see it too?
Ain’t no other way
Than to say I love you
They don’t understand what we go through
We got to have this heart to heart
So that we won’t part
We fight
We break up
But still it’s alright
We get back together
Maybe this time it will be forever

Like always guys, tell me what you think! I always love and appreciate your feedback!

- Esjae x

Wednesday, 20 July 2011

Poem - Ain’t Life a Bitch?

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Friends come and go
Just like the waves of the sea
Creating a web of lies
Is that the way life is meant to be?
Your muffled cries
Ignored by those who are meant to care
Laying motionless in a ditch
And all they are able to say is,
Ain’t life a bitch?

What do you think to this one? Too short to be effective?

- Esjae

Poem - Addict

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Shivering
Scratching at your skin
As if trying to let it in
Mind buzzing
Unable to focus
Eyes darting
Living like a dog
And then it comes
Sharp and powerful
A jolt of life into your body
How long will it last
Your heroin fix

I remember writing this one, I wrote one more recently quite like this. Which one do you prefer?

- Esjae

Poem - A Grain Of Rice

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Dying in Africa
We say we’re starving
The lost their life, just fighting for a grain of rice
Supermarkets scatter the streets
Imagine days on your feet
All for a grain of rice
Doctors on our doorstep
Think of dragging a loved one for miles around
In the hope that help will be found
Live a day in their life
And it’ll be easy
I’m not starving are you?

Looking on my old hard drive is producing quite a few poems, I’ll keep posting what I find.

- Esjae x

Poem - A Feeling No One Can Miss

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Walking hand in hand
Strolling side by side
I stare into your eyes
Met by your longing gaze
It’s a feeling that you can’t miss
Greeted by your kiss
Just to be with you
Is all I’d ever want to do

Another old one I’ve dug out for you, let me know what you think.

- Esjae x

Poem - A Dream Love

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Your breath on my neck
Our lips pressed together
A feeling I can’t describe
Every time your eyes meet mine
I fall deeper in love,
With your smile, with the blue in your eyes

I don’t need to search anymore
Because standing in front of my door
Is my knight, my Mr. Right

With so many fish in the sea,
I didn’t realise how easy it would be,
To find someone perfect for me

On my mind twenty four seven
My new found heaven
A future life
I long to be called your wife

This poem is one from a while back – I hope you enjoy it and like always let me know what you think! It’s featured in my ebook available on amazon.

- Esjae x

Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Join Me On…

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Heya guys,

Big news, I’ve deleted the facebook account where you could become my friend on there – but don’t worry I have something that will make it easier for everyone!

I have created a page you can go like it here – Esjae (just click and press like) . I’ll really appreciate everyone who likes it!

The reason for switching from a separate account and a page is quite simple I couldn’t keep my personal facebook open as well as the one for all of you!

Thanks

- Esjae x

Sunday, 17 July 2011

Poem - I wish I knew

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I'm standing on this rooftop
Trying to figure out how I can stop,
People having to stop dreaming,
People having to stop believing
How can I make a difference
How can I help those suffering in silence
What about those losing a loved one
What about those who have died before their life even begun
I see so many smiles that are disappearing
So many hateful words I keep hearing
What about those fighting for everyone
What about those without anyone
Fathers, Mothers,
Sisters, Brothers
Families torn apart
What do we do for those who can't have a fresh start
How about those with people in the sky
What about those who didn't have the chance to say goodbye

What do we do when praying isn't enough
What do we do when it all gets too tough
What do we do?

...I wish I knew...

Friday, 15 July 2011

Little Bit of an Update

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Heya everyone,

First of all I’d like to say a huge thanks to all of you for your kind comments and advise or questions on these posts, I really appreciate it!

Sorry about the lack of poems recently I haven’t had a chance to sit down and write properly. There will be some to come in the coming days though. Also I’m hoping to expand my writing into writing a short novel (which I am hoping to give away to my followers of this blog for free! – more on that later/ when it’s complete) . I’ve decided to focus more on my writing of poetry/ lyrics and stories because that’s what my passion is.

Again, thank you all for your support!

- Esjae x

Tuesday, 12 July 2011

Hook/ Chorus

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What if one day you could see
Me waiting for to see we can be
More than friends, stronger than lovers
Side by side, we're meant to be
But you just can see me

Another short hook/ chorus. I'm trying to find some singers/ producers I can work with would be good if I could see my work 'out there'

- Esjae x

Monday, 11 July 2011

Lyrics - Chorus/ Hook

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What do you do when you see something your not meant to see
What do I do when I think your running from me
What about us and everything we've ever stood for
Why couldn't you tell me you wanted to leave through that open door

 

Another short one, let me know what you think!

- Esjae x

Lyrics - Chorus / Hook

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Daddy, why weren't you ever around
When I needed you, you couldn't be found
You'd rather be out placing another bet
What happened to seeing me today, did you forget?

 

Another short hook or chorus that I wrote today

- Esjae x

Lyrics Hook/ Chorus

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No matter how much I want you to, you can't stay
I want you back, just for another day
There's so many things I want to say
But it's time for you to grow your wings and fly away

Another short chorus or hook.

- Esjae x

Lyrics– Chorus/ Hook

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I'm a dreamer, heading up to the stars
I want something more than material things and fast cars
I'm a dreamer, believer, that's me
So I'm going to be whatever I set out to be
Just watch me and you'll see


 

Another short chorus or hook.

- Esjae x

Sunday, 10 July 2011

Lyrics #2–Chorus/ Hook

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Chorus:
Never thought, you'd be one to walk away
Never thought, you'd give up so easily
Never thought, you'd turn your back on me
Never thought, you'd leave me on my own


I’ve been brainstorming a few ideas for some lyrics today, this is one of the short hooks/ choruses I cam up with.

Let me know what you think

-Esjae x

Lyrics #1–Chorus/ Hook

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Chorus:
I'm picking myself up, dusting myself down
Getting ready for life knowing you wont be around
I know it's your time, and you need your wings to fly
So I guess for now this is goodbye

I’ve been brainstorming a few ideas for some lyrics today, this is one of the short hooks/ choruses I cam up with.

Let me know what you think

-Esjae x

Saturday, 9 July 2011

I have a Kindle book!

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I forgot to post this when I actually finalised it all and when it was available in the marketplace, but yes I do have a kindle book that you can purchase! It’s really exciting!

If you’re from the UK you can buy it here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0057IM7YW

If your from the US you can buy it here: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0057IM7YW

It’s called ‘Words From A Teenage Mind’ the cover isn’t very exciting because I had to put it all together myself on a very limited budget… nothing.

The product description say:

Words From A Teenage Mind is the first book from the teenage author and poet Esjae (Stacey Hubbard).
This first release is both emotive and thought provoking using the real word as her inspiration Esjae portrays her own and other people's feelings on various topics relevant to the world today covering issues such as love, hurt, betrayal, relationships, friendships, crime, teen life, prejudice and stereotypes. Esjae's unique style shines through in each of these poems bringing something new to the world of poetry.

It doesn’t cost a lot $2.99 or £2.13 – I would appreciate it completely if anyone bought it! The kindle ebook reader is available for FREE for your pc, iphone, etc all you have to do is download it.

If you do buy it, then let me know what you think of the poems!

- Esjae x

PS – Thanks for all of the comments I’ve been receiving! got more stuff still to come!

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

Forever an Addict available on youtube

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Firstly, - Thank you for watching! If you enjoyed it please share it too! Also it would be great if you could tell me what you think of the poem by commenting with your thoughts. I would really appreciate it if you subscribed too or add me as a friend - also if you want other ways to contact me check out the links below.

Poem:

You drive me mad with temptations
Sending my mind crazy with hallucinations
The driving force to my day to day existence
I try not to but every time I have to give into your persistence
I'm trying to forget about you, scratching at my skin
I don't want to let you in
But your there, I'm yearning for your buzz
Once you're in, you help me forget, it all becomes a haze surrounded in a cloudy fuzz
I don't want you but I need you
It's like you're inside my head, you're reading my mind, you knew
I need to end this cycle, I need to get out of this rhythm
I don't want you, I want my freedom
But I need you, where have you gone
It was only an hour ago, but it feels so long
I need you yet again
But you lost me my home evicted by the councilmen
I'm homeless, got nowhere to go
I only took you once, then... I just don't know
I just needed you inside me
Like on my own I couldn't be free
Look at my life now
You weren't a bulldozer you were a plough
Turned my whole life upside down day by day
I was on the straight and narrow but you told me to stray
Now it's time to get back
Even though you put everything I once had under attack
I'm going to build it all up, but you won't knock it down again
Forever an addict, but I'll fight it... amen

 

LINKS:

Twitter: http://twitter.com/sj2093
Blog: http://esjaeofficial.blogspot.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/esjaeofficial

A few changes!

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You’ll probably notice of the next few days changes the layout, please bare with me while I get it all up and running.

You will notice a link down the side for adding me on facebook (so please do), this is my official account for my poetry. There is also a link to follow me on twitter.

The reason for all these changes are because I am going to be starting to take my poetry a lot more seriously! So this blog is becoming my official site!

- ESJAE x